What a year! I knew that it is really geeky to do a year in review. I wish that I was less geeky then I am I guess. I just feel like I need to highlight the challenges and the journey's I have had. Well, maybe it is not so much a year in review as a look back over my life's journey the last year. The things I have learned and the things that I want to share. As we finish up the Christmas season in the secular way. (Wahoo for the Church calendar as we are not quite done with Christmas...that is till my favorite season of all, in the Church year that is Epiphany!) So, maybe this is a review to start the next season in life the next phase in the spiritual life.
So, lets just say that it is the unpacking of this year in preparation for repacking for next year.
This is what I picked up as items packed and items that are souvenirs. ( I feel that Charles would be so proud of my theory.)
Life is hard...I know a big shock to everyone's understanding. I know, huge Epiphany there. No, I mean it really is hard. I never knew how hard it was till this past year. See what everyone has gone through in my family. Some times it is so hard that is sucks! With my Dad and all it has been hard and ever so trying. Flying from Calgary to Toronto...and back and forth and back and forth. The strength to just survive the airport in Toronto alone is unbelievable, let alone while ill. I still marvel at that. My Dad's strength to go on in life is something that I have learned to admire. He didn't ask to be sick or did he make himself sick. Yet, he blames no one. There is little talk about going after the people that made him sick. It happened in the past and I guess there is no reason to be angry about it.
My Mom is a rock. I have seen her go through a lot this year. I mean her name should be Peter. For she is the Rock that our family is built on. She still amazes me by what she did and is doing for not only my Dad but for my whole family I am blessed to have her as my Mom. I have learned to give more then I receive from her. I am not a good receiver because of it. I have learned to take care of those that need it. She has taught me the meaning of God giving you what you can handle. With every new thing she takes it in stride.
She is still teaching me about what type of Mother I want to be some day and a wife. .I still remember the most heartbreaking moment is last Christmas when my Mom came home after seeing my dad in the hospital and he wasn't looking good and she curled up and bed with me. (my mom and I slept together a lot then for comfort more then anything.) She said to me "He's my whole world." I want someone to be my whole world and for me to be theirs.
I am okay by myself. I know my last blog really went over it. BUT just to go over it. I went to Japan and Korea...It still feels like a dream...I went all by myself...I can do things that I want to do just with myself. It's not just that though. I lived the better part of a year all by myself. I did survive. I ate and cooked and got around. I went to the museum and out to brunch on a Sunday all by myself. I still have that great memory that I will never give up. I could live the rest of my life with myself and I could be okay. This is not saying that this is the greatest desire that I have for my life. I want to get married and I do want a family. But, I am okay till then!
God is Great! I know that is something that you should be reminded of all the time. But in the past year I have had encounters with people and moments that I know that God exists. There are moments...Lunch with Vickie by the beach and most beautiful place for shrine ever...Being Stuck on the mountain in Korea with Luke...Getting the medical plan for my Dad...Him going through and surviving everything that he has...The smile in that my nephew has when he laughs... My Niece's laugh...There are so many more big and little moments that make's me believe without a shadow of a doubt that God is Great! That God is the Father in heaven that blesses all with his presents! I do Love him like I could love anyone!
So, as this years journey ends and the next one begins....I hope I learn half as much or more of what I learned this year. I feel that I have been challenged and I feel that the challenges and learning experiences are not done in life. I just hope that maybe they will be a little less dramatic. I pray that everyone else learns and gains knowledge of what God is doing in there lives and takes the time to look back on the year and does there own unpacking and repacking.
For the journey never ends. The destination might look different but it is the gathering of experiences that you have that give the Epiphany journey some meaning. Work on the thing that looks unworkable. Take all you need and leave the rest. There are souvenirs that are worth taking home and others that are meant to cherish for a while and then be left in the end in the hotel room. I challenge everyone to unpack and repack for the new adventure is about to start.
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Top 10 Things I learned from my trip!
10. That Canadians are liked by most people
9. That Celebrities do have it rough
8. That being Caucasian in an Asian Country is a little like being a celebrity
7. Vending Machines should be everywhere in all countries. Not limited to drinks either!
6. That North Americans in any service industry that gets tipped have it easy. To tip is an insult in Japan and Korea
5. Chopsticks - Japan so easy and regular. Korea flat metal and easy once you get use to them.
4. Rice - eat all in Japan or you insult the host. Don't eat all in Korea or you haven't had enough to eat
3. Japanese people have a large addiction to fuzzy mickey mouse ears and hats.
2. Ontario really is the center of the universe...well according to Koreans. Koreans like to talk about Ontario. Japanese like to talk about the Mountains.
1. Calpis
9. That Celebrities do have it rough
8. That being Caucasian in an Asian Country is a little like being a celebrity
7. Vending Machines should be everywhere in all countries. Not limited to drinks either!
6. That North Americans in any service industry that gets tipped have it easy. To tip is an insult in Japan and Korea
5. Chopsticks - Japan so easy and regular. Korea flat metal and easy once you get use to them.
4. Rice - eat all in Japan or you insult the host. Don't eat all in Korea or you haven't had enough to eat
3. Japanese people have a large addiction to fuzzy mickey mouse ears and hats.
2. Ontario really is the center of the universe...well according to Koreans. Koreans like to talk about Ontario. Japanese like to talk about the Mountains.
1. Calpis
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
my trip!
I have returned from my trip not the same as I left. I feel that I have changed. I feel like I have grown. I am guessing that all trips should make you feel this way. You learn new things on new adventures whether they are great international trips or road trips across this great nation of ours or if you fly in a plane for hours or travel in a car for days. I feel that all journeys are important and are indeed moments of growth are within them.
I feel I have come back stronger then what I left. I have learned that I can be alone. I can eat by myself, I can tour a city by myself, and I can enjoy Disneyland alone. I am okay alone! I feel stronger because of it! I feel whole.
God lead me on this trip. Every aspect of me going on this trip was easy. I had more money then I need to be able to go. Every time I turned around I was getting money in the mail from pension pay outs or some other thing. God wanted me to go. I wanted to go. I needed to go.
I feel now that I can go anywhere and do anything. Once you have mastered 2 things I feel like you can travel anywhere. First, the point and order (this is really key in Asia, they are fans of pictures on there menus). You need no language connection if you can point to what you want. Always look for the picture menus. Second and equally as important is Charades. If you can mime it they will eventually know what you are looking, asking, telling them about. This is really useful in the case of a search of a washroom (toilet).
There are some things that I feel that one should know languge wise when travelling...Hello and thank you. When you are a tourist being polite Canadian is what you want to be. I felt that I never learned these 2 things in Korea and I wish I knew them.
So, you know when you are doing something that is going to be a great adventure but you really don't realize it. The ah ha Epiphany moment, (thank you charles!) that you have at any moment on an adventure or journey. I had a couple, first one would be when I first got to Tokyo and I am following the direction that my little hotel has give to get there. I have taken the limo bus to another hotel. I get a cab with the automatic door and a driver with a hat and white gloves. As I hand over the address to my hotel. This is where I need to explain addresses in Japan. First of all I should say I never knew this till later in my trip. Addresses in Japan are for a general area not to a direct location. Like one might say that my address could be 1013-7-10, Huntington hills, Calgary. Yup, very descriptive. So, I was in a taxi where the driver punch's the address in to the GPS and comes up with the route that the GPS gives it to get to my hotel. Well, GPS does not know about buildings and other things that get in the way of the most direct routes in Japan. I am in the taxi where the driver gets lost and somewhat confused by the directions the GPS has given him. He starts what I think of as swearing in Japanese. Me not knowing any Japanese at all and not understanding what he is say. I can tell by the tone of voice and his body languge that this is not a good situation for him. There are 3 things that are going through my mind at this point in time. First, This guy is wishing that this white person didn't get into his taxi to begin with. Second, I have no way of helping him at all and lastly and the factly the most important thing..."Wholy sh$t I am in Japan and what the hell was I thinking that I could do this all by myself. I don't know the languge. I don't know anyone.what am I doing here." The driver did turn around when we got to a gate that we could not go through and did get me there safe and sound. I was ever so releved to see the outside of the hotel that I had seen in pictures!
My second one is much more personal. The whole trip was the ah ha I can do this by myself. I can travel and figure things out by myself. If I needed to I can do it. I could live in a foreign country and enjoy it even. Or at least know enough to get by.
I feel I have come back stronger then what I left. I have learned that I can be alone. I can eat by myself, I can tour a city by myself, and I can enjoy Disneyland alone. I am okay alone! I feel stronger because of it! I feel whole.
God lead me on this trip. Every aspect of me going on this trip was easy. I had more money then I need to be able to go. Every time I turned around I was getting money in the mail from pension pay outs or some other thing. God wanted me to go. I wanted to go. I needed to go.
I feel now that I can go anywhere and do anything. Once you have mastered 2 things I feel like you can travel anywhere. First, the point and order (this is really key in Asia, they are fans of pictures on there menus). You need no language connection if you can point to what you want. Always look for the picture menus. Second and equally as important is Charades. If you can mime it they will eventually know what you are looking, asking, telling them about. This is really useful in the case of a search of a washroom (toilet).
There are some things that I feel that one should know languge wise when travelling...Hello and thank you. When you are a tourist being polite Canadian is what you want to be. I felt that I never learned these 2 things in Korea and I wish I knew them.
So, you know when you are doing something that is going to be a great adventure but you really don't realize it. The ah ha Epiphany moment, (thank you charles!) that you have at any moment on an adventure or journey. I had a couple, first one would be when I first got to Tokyo and I am following the direction that my little hotel has give to get there. I have taken the limo bus to another hotel. I get a cab with the automatic door and a driver with a hat and white gloves. As I hand over the address to my hotel. This is where I need to explain addresses in Japan. First of all I should say I never knew this till later in my trip. Addresses in Japan are for a general area not to a direct location. Like one might say that my address could be 1013-7-10, Huntington hills, Calgary. Yup, very descriptive. So, I was in a taxi where the driver punch's the address in to the GPS and comes up with the route that the GPS gives it to get to my hotel. Well, GPS does not know about buildings and other things that get in the way of the most direct routes in Japan. I am in the taxi where the driver gets lost and somewhat confused by the directions the GPS has given him. He starts what I think of as swearing in Japanese. Me not knowing any Japanese at all and not understanding what he is say. I can tell by the tone of voice and his body languge that this is not a good situation for him. There are 3 things that are going through my mind at this point in time. First, This guy is wishing that this white person didn't get into his taxi to begin with. Second, I have no way of helping him at all and lastly and the factly the most important thing..."Wholy sh$t I am in Japan and what the hell was I thinking that I could do this all by myself. I don't know the languge. I don't know anyone.what am I doing here." The driver did turn around when we got to a gate that we could not go through and did get me there safe and sound. I was ever so releved to see the outside of the hotel that I had seen in pictures!
My second one is much more personal. The whole trip was the ah ha I can do this by myself. I can travel and figure things out by myself. If I needed to I can do it. I could live in a foreign country and enjoy it even. Or at least know enough to get by.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Stormy Cloudy Love?
There has been tons of stuff flying and floating around in my head this past while. It all seems somewhat always there. In the middle of all this mixed up and tossed around thoughts. I am trying to find God. I am fighting to figure out what God wants from me. I know what I want. But would like to factor God into this equation as well. Maybe it just my rationalization of life and yes love that I am too good at. Maybe my sister is right. I am waiting for that fairytale romantic notion of what love is as seen in the countless movies that I do watch. Maybe as one has said, "You don't want to be in love. You want to be in love in the movie."
It has seemed as of late that there is and has been plenty of focus on love. People I know starting out those buddy romances,people getting married, people trying to fix me up with people, And People questioning my romantic love life or lack there of.
I thought that I was sure of when you know you know...But how do you know? What makes one realize who the right one for them is?
It has seemed as of late that there is and has been plenty of focus on love. People I know starting out those buddy romances,people getting married, people trying to fix me up with people, And People questioning my romantic love life or lack there of.
I thought that I was sure of when you know you know...But how do you know? What makes one realize who the right one for them is?
Friday, June 20, 2008
when the perfect song finds you in the perfect mood
"Don't Wanna Think About You"
by Simple Plan
Can you leave me here alone now
I don't wanna hear you say
That you know me
That I should be
Always doin what you say
Cuz I'm tryin to get through today
And there's one thing I know
I don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out
I Don't wanna think about you
Or think about nothin
Don't wanna talk this one out
I won't let you bring me down
Cuz I know
I don't wanna think about you
Don't wanna think about you
When I wake up here tomorrow
Things will never be the same
Cuz I won't wait
Cuz you won't change
And you'll always be this way
Now I'm gonna get through today
And there's one thing I know
I don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out
I don't wanna think about you
Or think about nothin
Don't wanna talk this one out
This time I won't let you bring me down
Won't let you shut me out
This time I know
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
Running as fast as I can
Run away
Run away
I'll never come back again
Run away
Run away
Don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out
Don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna talk this one out
I don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out (figure this out)
I don't wanna think about you
Or think about nothin
Don't wanna talk this one out
This time I won't let you bring me down (bring me down)
Won't let you shut me out (shut me out)
This time I know
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
I don't wanna think about you
by Simple Plan
Can you leave me here alone now
I don't wanna hear you say
That you know me
That I should be
Always doin what you say
Cuz I'm tryin to get through today
And there's one thing I know
I don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out
I Don't wanna think about you
Or think about nothin
Don't wanna talk this one out
I won't let you bring me down
Cuz I know
I don't wanna think about you
Don't wanna think about you
When I wake up here tomorrow
Things will never be the same
Cuz I won't wait
Cuz you won't change
And you'll always be this way
Now I'm gonna get through today
And there's one thing I know
I don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out
I don't wanna think about you
Or think about nothin
Don't wanna talk this one out
This time I won't let you bring me down
Won't let you shut me out
This time I know
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
Running as fast as I can
Run away
Run away
I'll never come back again
Run away
Run away
Don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out
Don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna talk this one out
I don't wanna think about you
Think about me
Don't wanna figure this out (figure this out)
I don't wanna think about you
Or think about nothin
Don't wanna talk this one out
This time I won't let you bring me down (bring me down)
Won't let you shut me out (shut me out)
This time I know
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
I don't wanna think about you
Run away
Run away
I don't wanna think about you
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Friday, April 25, 2008
Monday, April 07, 2008
I Miss You!
When You're Gone
BY AVRIL LAVIGNE
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus]
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you
I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus]
We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah
[Chorus]
Missing You
BY AMY GRANT
Your smile lights up a room
Like a candle in the dark
It warms me through and through
And I guess that I had dreamed
We would never be apart
But that dream did not come true
[Chorus:]
Missing you is just a part of living
Missing you feels like a way of life
I'm living out the life that I've been given
But baby I still wish you were mine
And I cannot hear the telephone
Jangle on the wall
And not feel a hopefull thrill
And I cannot help but smile
At any news of you at all
And I guess I always will
[Chorus]
BY AVRIL LAVIGNE
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus]
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you
I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus]
We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah
[Chorus]
Missing You
BY AMY GRANT
Your smile lights up a room
Like a candle in the dark
It warms me through and through
And I guess that I had dreamed
We would never be apart
But that dream did not come true
[Chorus:]
Missing you is just a part of living
Missing you feels like a way of life
I'm living out the life that I've been given
But baby I still wish you were mine
And I cannot hear the telephone
Jangle on the wall
And not feel a hopefull thrill
And I cannot help but smile
At any news of you at all
And I guess I always will
[Chorus]
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Diamonds....
Coffee Shop
by Landon Piggs
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes theres a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you.
I've seen the paths that your eyes wander down
I want to come too
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
No one understands me quite like you do
Through all of the shadowy corners of me
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while I never knew
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while I never knew
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes theres a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you.
I've seen the waters that make your eyes shine
Now I'm shining too
Because oh because
I've fallen quite hard over over you
If I didnt know you, I'd rather not know
If I couldnt have you, I'd rather be alone
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while I never knew
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while, I never knew
All of the while , all of the while
I am absolutely in love with this song. I fall for songs every once and a while. (I am a sucker for anything acoustic. If you play acoustic I could love you forever!) I fell in love with this song like most who have heard it in the diamond commercial. (diamonds are forever) Though every time I watch the commercial I am slightly irritated. Why one would ask...because of the context in which the song is used. Do to the lyrics. The first verse is what is used in the commercial.
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes theres a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you.
I've seen the paths that your eyes wander down
I want to come too
So, like me a hopeless romantic that I am. I picture the perfect proposal moment as I hear the lyrics. Really I see my proposal moment. I see candle light, roses, chocolate and this song either being played to me or in the background. It is perfect.
But the real commercial falls short of all these dreams.
by Landon Piggs
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes theres a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you.
I've seen the paths that your eyes wander down
I want to come too
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
No one understands me quite like you do
Through all of the shadowy corners of me
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while I never knew
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while I never knew
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes theres a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you.
I've seen the waters that make your eyes shine
Now I'm shining too
Because oh because
I've fallen quite hard over over you
If I didnt know you, I'd rather not know
If I couldnt have you, I'd rather be alone
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while I never knew
I never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
I love so much
All of the while, I never knew
All of the while , all of the while
I am absolutely in love with this song. I fall for songs every once and a while. (I am a sucker for anything acoustic. If you play acoustic I could love you forever!) I fell in love with this song like most who have heard it in the diamond commercial. (diamonds are forever) Though every time I watch the commercial I am slightly irritated. Why one would ask...because of the context in which the song is used. Do to the lyrics. The first verse is what is used in the commercial.
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes theres a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you.
I've seen the paths that your eyes wander down
I want to come too
So, like me a hopeless romantic that I am. I picture the perfect proposal moment as I hear the lyrics. Really I see my proposal moment. I see candle light, roses, chocolate and this song either being played to me or in the background. It is perfect.
But the real commercial falls short of all these dreams.
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